Too many toys?

My daughter had a friend over today for a play date. Her friend asked where all of her toys were. I explained that we get rid of the old toys and try to keep the ones that are played with. She said she has rooms full of toys and she probably does have a lot. Why do kids have so many toys? When I asked what she got from Christmas she couldn't remember and my children really can't answer this question either.
When I was a child and returned to school after Christmas vacation we shared what we got for Christmas. Everyone said what they got and it was usually one big thing and a few little things including socks and underwear. I remember my Easy Bake Oven. I got it the Christmas we lived in Aurora, IL. It was a great gift. But that was my gift. My children received about 10 things each. I know it's my fault, maybe we just are too indulgent or maybe we just have more to spend. But it seem that children are used to getting "stuff'" almost everyday. McDonald's gives them a toy, Cost Cutters or the barber shop gives them a small toy or candy, the bank gives them stickers. Hey, these kids are used to it.

Learning to use the computer

As a mom who grew up before computers, I find it fascinating to see my children catch on to computer use so quickly. My daughter just turned 5 yet she is navigating her way around with a mouse and learning techniques it took me a long time to learn.

Reflections on Christmas

Well, the holidays are just about over. New Years has no appeal for me. It's a great holiday if you're single but I don't and can't stay up late enough to enjoy the party.
I'll probably take the tree down tomorrow. I love to get an early Christmas tree but a few days after Christmas Day I want it down, the decorations packed away and my living room cleaned. It will take months to get the fir needles out of the room. Just when you think they're gone in March or April and - move the sofa and find some more.
The kids are happy with what Santa brought them. Hubby is happy and I am happy. The family visits were lovely. Everyone ate too much- even me and as a diabetic I have to be really careful. I even slipped a bit and my sugars are a little high. Oh well, Christmas cookies are only around once a year and I had to try a couple.
I'm keeping up with the morning class for the kids. We started again today. I don't want them to have off 10 days and not write their names or have any counting or math. I'm trying to keep it fun and besides, they don't look at it as real school anyway so they both enjoy the routine.

Merry Christmas!

To everyone a Blessed and Merry Christmas!

First day of Christmas vacation!!!

Well, it's the first day of Christmas vacation for the children. We baked gingerbread for a gingerbread house, watched a little of the movies, "A Christmas Carol "and "It's a Wonderful Life". The kids told us the first movie was too creepy and the second is too boring. No snow this Christmas, just cold rain, rain, rain. The kids went out to play and we had a silly muddy mess.
It's now time for sweet tea and cookies.

Being an advocate for your child during an IEP meeting.

I have requested a new IEP for my son. After reading this article about IEP meetings, I feel that I can approach the team with open ears and be an advocate for my son.
I feel that I am realistic of his needs and I look forward to the results of his assessment.

Chicago visit

Hubby and I took the kids to Chicago today for a day trip. The ride is only 1 1/2 hours and it was such a nice day today. Perfect for a road trip. I wanted to show my children the "old " neighborhood. I wanted to show they where mommy went to school. I showed my kindergarten at Immaculate Heart of Mary Parish.
Now, I haven't been in this area for years and all of my family has long since moved to the suburbs, but I felt quite nostalgic. I remember the streets, the church, my old home on Kimball.
We took a skyline photo of my daughter with her Troll for school. We ate lunch in the Ukrainian Village. (20th and Chicago Ave.) and we had a nice walk down some lovely streets.
All in all, a very nice day.

Half Day School

We are starting a new routine at home. After meeting with my son's teachers and principle, we have decided to change his schedule to half days.
He stays home with me in the morning and we work on his handwriting and simple math skills. He will continue to receive speech. I will then bring him to school afternoons so that he will be with his friends for 2 1/2 hours.
He won't have any bus rides or cafeteria time which is too noisy and stressful.
We just started so wish us luck.
Any homeschool sites that you recommend would be appreciated.

Bonding

Here is a piece about bonding exercises. Special needs or not, all children can use more bonding.

Blizzard of 2006

We're still digging out. Over 12" of snow.

Snow Day!!!

Is homeschooling the way to go?

After a difficult day and little sleep, I have be wondering if homeschooling is the way to go for my son. Even though I feel and know that he is stronger everyday, school is a major stress for him. From the bus ride to a noisy lunch room to friendship difficulties, he finds it at time overwhelming. Today when I picked him up, he was wet, poopy and looked in such obvious distress. It took all night, a long bath and much cuddles to get him to make eye contact.
If school causes such distress, maybe he needs to stay home with me this year. One more year to develop emotionally. One more year to find his place in our world.
This is one big decision.

Post-Institutionalized children

I read this article about post-institutionalized children and agree with much of it.
Common sense is best. Stay with your children. Let them first bond with you. Don't over stimulate them. Life in an orphanages is very different than life in the US. Walking through the grocery store with my young children the first time was disturbing to them. Too much noise, lights, things to see. We are a nation of stuff and these kids have had nothing.
Baby them. Many of them never had a mommy to pick them up, coo to them and hold the bottle. These children were left in cribs to cry and a bottle was propped. My six year old still loves a baby toy that when pulled sings rock a bye baby. He still likes a warm milk and sugar sippy cup given to him by me like a bottle. My 4 year old still likes to have me put her in a sling. And at 38 lbs. she fits, but it's hard on my back. But she has such joy on her face to be held like a baby, I can't resist. I really encourage baby wearing for your adopted children and all children.

Giving Thanks

I hope everone had a memorable Thanksgiving. We went to one of my sister's and it was a very nice day. Beautiful weather, kids in great moods, delicious food and good company.
I use to find holidays difficult and stressful because of increased behavior problems of my son. But now that he has resolved much of his anger or maybe just learned to trust, we are having such nice visits and I don't worry that we can only stay one hour before a scene erupts.
I'm glad to see that he wants to play with his sister and cousins. I'm thrilled we aren't having such bad eating/ food / control issues.
I'm thankful for good therapists, teachers, family and God for helping my son feel happiness and maybe even love.
I'm thankful for a strong, wonderful husband who takes such good care of us.
I'm thankful for a joy of a daughter.
I'm thankful for a family who supports us with love and time.

Winter is here???

After the wonderful warm weather we had this week, it looks like we have an early taste of winter. Hubby is asking to move south again. 33 degrees and ice and snow make him start his refrain. "Let's go somewhere warm"
I can't stand this weather" I think he is starting to wear me down. He certainly has the kids convinced that there is a magical place to live where it's always warm. Yesterday my daughter asked me why I want to stay here (Wisconsin) and I replied"It's where my family is , honey" I have 2 parents and 7 brother and sisters here in Wisconsin. Numerous cousins and aunts in the Chicago area where I was born. It feels like home.
But my daughter wise to her 4 years replied, "But I'm your family and George and Daddy and Bailey (Our dog).
I can't see where warm weather makes a life better, maybe more comfortable but not better or richer in spirit. But I am wearing down a bit. And bitter cold early winter weather doesn't help.

Fall is here

After a great day in warm 60's weather, I was able to clean up my flower beds and put my garden to rest for the year. I enjoy this part of gardening. I get a sense of completeness. After all of the work of spring and summer to enjoy the gardens I have, I now get to cut everything back and we both can rest. Today it is the normal weather, 40's, and I can sit at the window with a cup of tea and look at everything tidy and ready for winter.

Election Day

To all moms who haven't voted yet, I ask you to try and get to the polls. I don't care how you vote (Well maybe I do, but that doesn't matter)
I ask you to find the time, drag the kids with you and vote. Whether you feel this election is a referendum on the Bush administration, you are angry with the dems or you are voting to have a say in the referendums in your individual state, please vote.
When I went out to vote this morning, my daughter was at my feet behind the curtain of the voting booth, yes, it's distracting but I want her to see that mom votes on election day. She and her brother hear my husband and I discuss the issues and I want them to see that everyone has a voice in our government.

Gotcha Day!

Tomorrow my husband and I will celebrate the children's gotcha day. Gotcha day for those of you who haven't adopted is the day you finalized the child's adoption and you officially "got" them. But for my husband and I, it is the day we "found" our children.
Three years ago we were living in an apartment in Kiev waiting to go back to the Adoption Center and look at all of the books of orphans. Ukraine had the policy that you do not preselect a child to adopt, you find them when in the country.
A date is set and you go with your translator to the Government Adoption Center and meet with a psychologist and look at photos and books from orphanages to select a child to see. You then travel usually by train to the city where the orphanage is and visit the child. You then decide if you would like to adopt the child. If not, back to the Adoption Center in Kiev and back to the books.
We had been in Kiev and selected a 2 year old boy to see. We traveled all night on the train and met with the director of the orphanage to arrange to see the child. I was so excited, scared, eager but when we went to his room we found a very sick, disabled and weak boy. I held him and cried. I was open to adopting a child with many disabilities but this child was not for us. This child needed 24 hour care for the rest of his life and I couldn't do it. I knew this was not to be my son. I still think about this little boy and pray he is cared for and loved.
After returning to Kiev and meeting again with the Adoption Center we were shown a photo of another little boy who had just turned 3. The photo was him in a crib with the saddest look I had ever seen on a child. We said we would see him. Since we had hoped to adopt 2 children, I told them to show me the girls available. Even though it is difficult to find a girl, I knew I wanted to complete out family with a girl and I wanted my husband to have a girl to love and to adore him. We searched but I didn't get any feelings of wanting to see any child until the back of the book one of the last pages was a photo of an infant girl. She was 20 months old now but sick, blind and probably retarded. She was most likely a child of fetal German measles. They encouraged us to skip her but my heart went out to her.
The next day we left by train. The Sunny Orphanage had 300 children 0-3 years old and from what we saw they were very poor. I have traveled a lot in my life but Ukraine was poor.
We met with little Vladdy first, shy with big brown eyes. Small and non -verbal. This sad little boy came to us and I knew that he was meant to be our son.
Later we went to another building to see Masha. They brought her out to the waiting room and I started to weep. A blond pale child with scabs and sores all over her face and body (allergies and exzema) a blind small right eye and low vision left eye and it was evident that this little child couldn't see. But, I knew she was my daughter. Even when my husband said are you sure and the translators said we can find you a better one I knew that she was meant to be ours.
There is so much more I could say, the whole trip and month spent in Ukraine is a book waiting to be written. But tomorrow is the day-Halloween, when we found our children and to me it will always be their Gotcha Day.

Site changes

There will be a few changes to the site. The login for existing members is now a new link at the bottom of the home page.
I have listened to the suggestions for registration and those are in the works. I want the registration process to be quick, easy and painless.
Any other suggestion you have please email me. I am always open to new ideas.

The most perfect day.

Did you ever have one of those most perfect days. I did today. The kids were good in church, they didn't fight all day, even at the pumpkin farm.
The weather was my favorite. A sunny fall day at peak fall colors with a slight breeze. Winter jacket weather but not too cold.
We visited grandma and grandpa after Mass.
Then, after the pumpkin farm and bouncy houses and pony rides, we carved pumpkins and baked pumpkin seeds. We ate caramel apples after supper and still the kids are great. I am very lucky.

Moms from tiny towns

Right now the kids are watching SpongeBob and the hubby is working late. I have had such a busy week that I don't have the time or energy to play games or do something educational with the kids tonight, and of course they are perfectly happy to veg while I work on the computer.
We have a fair at Hamilton HS tomorrow morning to support the Cultural Exchange Club which my niece is in charge of. The kids go to a pumpkin farm with an auntie and I get some down time. Maybe a good chick movie on LMN or Sell House Marathon. I think it's been months since I've had a few hours alone. Yippy!!! I'm looking forward to the Shop till you Drop at Willow Springs in November so that I can register lots of Sussex, Falls, Brookfield and assorted Lake Country moms.

I've had a run of moms registering from tiny, tiny, towns. You know who you are:) The hardest job for me is to find exchange moms for these gals. I have started to write the elementary schools in the town to share the Mommy Time concept and offer brochures and specials so that these moms can find time off.
I just started this but it is helping in some smaller California and Texas towns so I'll keep it up for all moms from more rural areas.